Once upon a time, a girl who liked to wander encountered the boy who loved to knit. I can’t say their eyes sparkled and fireworks went off, but, one way or another, there was substantial chemistry between them. As the days passed by, the girl who liked to wonder discovered that the boy who loved to knit also loved to restlessly talk about it. Indeed, he loved it so much, he even brought his knitted creations on their dates and continued to knit as they walked side by side, engaged in conversation, or kissed. As more days passed by, things turned sour. His obsession about knitting was simply overwhelming, if not boring her to death. Time after time she would find herself looking blankly at him, while he was upraising the perks of knitting…
How their story ended can be mildly irrelevant, since I’m trying to raise a point here. Firstly, a disclaimer: I have absolutely nothing against knitting, I assure you. I know at least three people out there, who enjoy it greatly. And one of them may or may not be over 50. Secondly, how the idea about the boy who loved to knit was born: On the one hand, it was inspired by the original boy who loved to knit. As a result, I see a facebook report coming my way. On the other hand, I may or may have not gotten the idea by a fellow blogger and avid commenter of my blog, who once mentioned being on a date with a guy who started talking about opera and never stopped.
How opera and knitting relates, you may ask. Well, knitting is an exemplary activity/hobby that I picked in order to address the subject of boys, girls, friends, or even relatives (good luck with that!), who cannot stop talking enthusiastically about their favorite hobby. Knitting was a random choice. Or, maybe, it was not so random, because I wanted the story to sound humorous quirky. What beats the thought of a guy who is knitting on the first date?
Anyway, let’s suppose you meet this boy – or girl, it’s up to you. Let’s suppose that, despite this shtick, you enjoy their company and would like to keep hanging out with them… if it wasn’t for these damn knitting lectures! What should you do?
1. Pick up knitting. Or at least give it a try, so as to figure out why they are so enthusiastic about it. I just cross my fingers and wish that their hobby is not skydiving and you are crazily afraid of heights.
2. Try to engage them in conversations about other topics. Try to figure out if they might be interested in something else, as well. Something that could lead to a discussion you will both enjoy.
3. Try to engage them in conversations about your hobbies and interests. See how willing they are to discuss subjects that matter to you. Split the time in half; if you went knitting on the first date, then you get to choose what you will do in the second one, and so on. Pick wisely; pick something you enjoy. After all, relationships – all kind of them – are about sharing. You don’t need to make a list of issues you can discuss; your intentions should be implicit. Change subjects and steer the conversation towards other things (e.g. ‘Hey! Was that Lady Gaga that just passed by?’).
4. The last resort: Confront them openly. Be straightforward and clear about what annoys you. But, above everything else, remain polite. As one of my closest friends Instagramed lately, ‘speak when you’re angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret’. You can’t go around scolding people about their passions and interests. Sometimes talking too much – or knitting on dates – is something they might do subconsciously, because they just love knitting soooo much. Oh, and maybe a little more than that.
Take my advice with a grain of salt, that’s the way advice should be always treated. Game of Thrones is an excellent example of what can happen to you when you trust someone blindly. I wrote this piece because a couple years ago, when I was dating the boy who loved to knit, I never said anything. I never complained. I just nodded and smiled. And then I would go back to my friends and whine about how insufferable and boring our date was. There were, of course another reasons I kept dating him – not a bad chap, after all, but, looking backwards, I think I would have been happier, if I had been more honest. And I think my friends will agree with this statement, too.
Last but not least, I would like to say that I have been lucky enough to come across some very talented people, such as athletes, students, musicians, people who are tremendously socializing, telling jokes, and baking muffins (these are considered talents in my list), and I have noticed the following: They never brag so much about the things they are most passionate – I’m leaving good out of this equation – about. They won’t tell you how awesome knitting is; they are more likely to excuse themselves after the second drink, go home, and wake up early the next day for knitting practice.
What are your thouhgts on this matter? I’d be glad to read your comments!
Un beso enorme to all my wonderful readers!
Hop you enjoyed this post!
Hop you enjoyed this post!